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Letter from a Mean Girl to Her Classmates

Dear Classmates,

Many years have passed.  Most of you haven’t heard from me since the day we graduated from high school.  When the powers that be closed the doors of our school forever that day, I closed the doors on my past.  I left for another city and never returned to live in the area again.

Perhaps by now, all these years later, we have gained enough perspective to know that we were in a unique situation.  30 kids.  Practically empty school.  Teachers leaving us midway through the year (I had 18 study periods per week due to teacher attrition by that January).  Parents fighting with each other and the organization to keep the school open.  The tensions were high and our collective esteem was low.

Some of us may not want to be reminded of our time together in school.  Some of us have kept in contact with a few good friends.  I wanted to write you a short note to say that despite my absence, I think about all of us.  I wonder how we are all finding our way through the world after leaving such an insular and ultimately devastating school experience.  Perhaps most of you have fond memories that float above the painful ones, but I have yet to heal in some places.  Opening the senior yearbook instantly transports me back into that desperate feeling of being trapped.

This doesn’t mean that I wanted to get away from all of you.  Like many of us, my home situation mirrored the abandonment in our school environment.  I was just counting down the days until I could get to some place where I felt wanted.  Many of you tried to reach out to me, but it was too late; My eyes had been on the horizon since we were in 9th grade.  I’m so sorry if anger at my situation came out on you.  Looking back, it seems like many of us were feeling the exact same thing.  I forgive you, and hopefully you can come to forgive me too.

We all may not be ready this year, or next, or even for yet another decade, but I’m asking those of us who still harbor pain, including myself, to begin to think about letting it go.   Maybe if we let it go we can see each other again, we can talk and bring closure or new beginnings.  I’m not saying that we will all be best friends; we never were.  But maybe there is something left hanging for you, something that needs to be put to rest that can be.  I don’t know if anything good will come of it.  But I know we should try.

I truly hope you doing well. I look forward to hearing from you all someday.

Sincerely,

Christine

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Live Streaming Morality

Today in the public library of quaint suburb of an old American city, images of blissful toddlers were being live streamed to the internet. Parents unwittingly wandered in and out of the shot. Librarians played along politely while trying to work. The cameraman’s friend plastered on a nervous smile and ducked away as much as possible. Men from Great Britain, Australia, and the U.S.A came to watch and to send chat messages to the cameraman in real time. This went on, unnoticed and unsuspected, for 13 minutes.

Why did no-one notice? Because the cameraman wasn’t hoisting a large news camera and microphone boom on a shoulder. The camera being used was smaller than a pack of Twinkies. If people noticed, they assumed the finicky shooter was taking multiple still shots but never managed to make the flash work. Perhaps they thought the cameraman was acting a bit odd talking to the camera at times, but no-one protested, nor was any the wiser.

I was the cameraman. The camera was a Nokia N95, an advanced mini computer, phone and video camera capable of sending live video to websites. It fits in the palm of my hand, yet the video is broadcast-news level quality. Anyone with about $700 to spend can have one. Perhaps if the cameraman was indeed a male, suspicions would arise more easily, but I am as non-threatening as a woman could be, and no-one even thought to notice my actions.

My local public library installed free wifi. I live streamed with it today, using a Nokia N95 and a website/application called Qik. My toddler son and I were in the (mostly vacant) children’s room with my good friend Cathy and her son, as well as the head children’s librarian. “I’m live streaming to the internet right now” was the only ‘warning’ I offered. Not much of a warning at all, of course, because their images were already sent, and were continuing to be sent to qik.com for anyone to see.

I am an ‘early adopter;’ I am eager to test out new technologies like smart phones and laptops, as well as new applications like software and websites. The inevitable bugs and bumps in the start-up road don’t usually bother me. It’s fun and thrilling to watch a tech phenomenon develop, a pursuit I enjoyed at an early age when my brother was a pre-teen hacker back in the late 1970’s.

My stream had no point except to show us passing time at the library. A few of my on-line friends showed up to the chat room, as well as a stranger from half way around the world. It was all purely innocent in intention, I assure you. After I returned home, the unease settled in.

When my son was tucked safely away for his nap, I posted an Utterz discussing how I felt that I was being a bit aggressive by live streaming without prior consent from the characters in the video. I didn’t talk about the hint of nervousness on my friend’s face or how the librarian said that she was ‘freaked out’ by seeing me shoot her while seeing her real-time image on a website, but those things were on my mind when I posted. I feel like I owe them an apology.

How do I avoid this in the future? How can I avoid that “I streamed you even though you didn’t consent” regret I felt today? How do I stream ethically in order to protect community members and myself?

Looking for suggestions, I recorded an Utterz and turned the question to Twitter. Here are some responses (which, again, I’m printing without permission, assuming that it’s kosher to do so):

bear said - anyone streaming live video should be required to wear a bright yellow shirt that reads ON AIR think of live reporting from a demonstration, a plane crash, a war zone, faces in the crowd during a speech -no consent- news folk get in trouble for no consent when kids are involved - maybe this sort of thing also depends on how well you can see the kids and for how long - intrusion vs fleeting -  a hard call  just be like @scobelizer and run up to someone and say

Pishba (Patty Hartwell) continued the conversation via email:

As for little cameras like the N95 that is exactly my point — people have no idea what is actually happening with that little gadget which is why if I had one I’d feel obligated to mention it was live streaming –

Agreed – who wants to piss off their friends, community with something like this — especially since it means they will be much less likely to cotton to live streaming in the future if they feel they have been burned in some way.

Not to mention what it does to your friendship.

ScottSys, replied in Utterz:

Unless you are live streaming in a bathroom with someone, the only thing you risk is boring people to death. There is no expectation of privacy in public and you can record all you want. If on the other hand you specifically record someone else engaged in a conversation they think is private, you need to bone up on your wiretapping laws. News channels do not get a release from everyone.

Michael Bayer replied on Utterz:

Excellent question you raise.
My personal (non legally informed) opinion is that any time you put someone else in the picture, you should ask their permission – particularly if it’s going to be broadcast. Forget the Borat-like issues (were they drunk? were they misled?)…I think it’s just good manners to let someone know what’s going to happen with their image and thoughts. Of course, a video stream (live or recorded) allows you to document the approval, but who wants the question right in their video?

We’ll have to let the courts decide on this one…probably too early to be well tested yet.

Any lawyers out there that want to weigh in on this one?

We are all basically saying here is that it is rude to tape someone in a spy-like manner. Little cameras like the N95 are harder to spot than traditional, shoulder-rest cameras. I liked @bear’s suggestion of wearing some kind of sign, a hat or something, but that won’t be adopted by many end-users as the technology spreads. In 20 years, it will be a non-issue, sure. But we as early adopters have an obligation at the ‘get-go’ to start things off ethically, to set up a tradition of respect.

First we need to start with education. So, a task item, for you dear reader is: Please explain to someone today, if you can, what live streaming is. That’s it. Task item for me: Think up scripts that don’t sound dorky that give fair notice of streaming. Perhaps make business cards that say “you’ve just been streamed, please visit www.thesitenamehere.com/username to see your video” and find a way to hand them out gracefully.

Any other tasks? Comments? Thanks to all who responded to me today!

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Convenient and believable expanation of my activities.

Social media is hard to explain to non-participants. Now we have an article from a ‘trusted’ resource, CNN, to which I can point in case anyone asks why I want to meet up and break bread with a bunch of strangers, why I’ve become a Jeff Pulver fan in a matter of months, or why Twitter is worth my time. (not that anyone anyone ever asks me that…)

the URL or click here:

http://money.cnn.com/2008/02/29/technology/kirkpatrick_socialmedia.fortune/

index.htm?postversion=2008022911

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Social Media Haikus

Jonny Goldstein put out a challenge on Utterz for a Haiku-a-Day. I managed only one. You can go to my account, PurpleCar, on Utterz or here to listen, but here is the text:

 

Endless messages,
A desperate search, I swear
you said you loved me. 

 


				
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11 Questions: Chris Brogan

11 QUESTIONS FOR MEDIA MAVENS ABOUT READING

Due to the little tiny bit of controversy in my “riding fences” post, I asked a few media mavens to answer a few quick questions about their reading habits and how they see themselves as readers.

A big thank you from me goes out to the participants from our small social media circle. Still waiting to hear back from iJustine, but here are the participants in this impromptu study: DYKC, CC Chapman, Annie Boccio, Julia Roy, Eric Rice, Amanda Gravel, Chris Brogan, Jeff Pulver and Ewan Spence.

I am breaking the results up across several posts, in the interest of spacing.

Please leave a comment with your answers/thoughts; I’ve posted the questions below to copy and paste. Thanks, and enjoy!

1. In one (can be hyphenated!) word, how would you describe your career, culture or identity. E.g., “I am a(n) ________.”
2. Do you think this identity has been represented well in art (including fiction, film, poetry)?
3. What do you typically do on long trips (plane, train, auto) for entertainment?
4. What traditional paper & print media, if any, do you read on a regular basis?
5. What is the last fiction novel or short story you remember reading? When was this?
6. What is your preferred genre for fiction and/or non-fiction?
7. Would you rather read a novel or listen to it?
8. Approximately how many page books do you buy in a year for yourself or other adults?
9. Please pick up the book nearest to you now. What are the first and last words? What is the title?
10. You’ve just been given $300 gift card to Borders right before a 3-week trip to an ‘off the grid’ island. What do you buy?
11. What connections, if any, do you see between social media and traditional fiction?

1. In one (can be hyphenated!) word, how would you describe your career, culture or identity. E.g., “I am a(n) ________.”

CHRIS BROGAN: community-maker.

2. Do you think this identity has been represented well in art (including fiction, film, poetry)?

CHRIS BROGAN: Yes. Very well. I think community is as old as story. It’s the glue that makes a tribe out of a bunch of people.

3. What do you typically do on long trips (plane, train, auto) for entertainment?

CHRIS BROGAN: I read books and magazines, and synthesize ideas for my blog and for other writing projects. I deliver as much output as I can, because I consider that time perfect for keeping me offline.

4. What traditional paper & print media, if any, do you read on a regular basis?

CHRIS BROGAN: I read Fast Company and Wired Magazine in print. Wired, as sometimes described by Chris Anderson, is more like a monthly book. I feel that way about its production value.

5. What is the last fiction novel or short story you remember reading? When was this?

CHRIS BROGAN: I read The Thief Lord, by Cornelia Funk and finished it two months ago. Before that, it was Spook Country by William Gibson, 3 months ago.

6. What is your preferred genre for fiction and/or non-fiction?

CHRIS BROGAN: In fiction, I prefer cyberpunk and some of its more recent descendants, but I don’t read a lot of fiction any more. In non-fiction, I mix it up between memoirs, business books, theory/science books, and the occasional zeitgeist book.

7. Would you rather read a novel or listen to it?

CHRIS BROGAN: Honestly, listen to it, because I have a really long commute, and it’s a great way to get reading done.

8. Approximately how many page books do you buy in a year for yourself or other adults?

CHRIS BROGAN: If you mean how many books do I buy for people and myself in a given year, I’m slowing down on BUYING books, because I use the library. For others, maybe between 12-20.

9. Please pick up the book nearest to you now. What are the first and last words? What is the title?

CHRIS BROGAN: The, Together. Book: Connect, by Anne Zelenka.

10. You’ve just been given $300 gift card to Borders right before a 3-week trip to an ‘off the grid’ island. What do you buy?

CHRIS BROGAN: A mix of business how-to books, leadership books, a few cyberpunk novels, some memoirs, and graphic novels.

11. What connections, if any, do you see between social media and traditional fiction?
Social media is a great way for fiction authors to connect and/or observe. Both are necessary to the future of the genre.

CHRIS BROGAN: Social media is a great way for fiction authors to connect and/or observe. Both are necessary to the future of the genre.

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